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eunice ann

tales of a girl trying to make sense of it all.

This is what I know:

May 28, 2010 by euniceann

It’s been a crazy week. But a good one. One that has ended with good spirits and high hopes. And most importantly, one that will wipe #78 right off the list.

Yep, that’s right. I found a (very small) home to rent. I move in next week. I can’t wait.

It is ridiculously small. As in, the stove has four burners, but it’s about half the size of a normal stove. The living room might have room for a small couch or two chairs from Ikea. I won’t be having family get-togethers at my house any time soon. But I am not complaining. I would rather live in my own tiny little house than live in the half of my brother’s old bedroom I have been sharing with Alissa for the past year.

That was the highlight of my week, having that fall into place.

I also received a completely unexpected bonus from work yesterday. That was pretty awesome. I am going to buy the lens I’ve been eyeballing with it.

And I will be spending the last half of my weekend with my best friend and her kids. It’s gonna be great. And I will probably see Dan for a minute in there too.

I’m choosing to enjoy the good things that happened this week, rather than dwell on the one thing that pissed me off that deflated the whole thing. I’ll blog about that next week.

Happy.

May 23, 2010 by euniceann

I’m happy today. Happy because I’m thinking back to what a great day Friday was.

Friday, I spent my day off in Phoenix with Dan. Well, I didn’t spend my whole day off. He had a meeting and I had to, well drive there, but we did get to spend a few hours of the day together. Some would say that it seems strange to drive 167 miles to see someone you’re not even sure you’re serious about, just to spend three hours with them and drive back, but it didn’t seem strange at all.

In fact, it felt magically right.

As I drove home Friday afternoon, glad to escape the sweltering heat that is Phoenix, while wondering if it was the ginger broccoli or the potstickers that gave me the horrendous indigestion that made the trip home uncomfortable, I thought about what attracted me to Dan so much. I liked him the minute I met him. And two months later, we went on the most perfect first date ever.

Two hours and fifteen minutes later, I still can’t put a finger on it. But for once in my life, I don’t feel like I have to. I don’t feel like I have to explain or justify my relationship with him in terms that anyone needs to understand, as I have in the past  – “Sure, he’s not great looking, but he’s a really talented writer.” or “I know he’s only 5’3″, but he opens my car door!” or “Yes, he’s completely massacred my heart on many occasions, but I love him.”

He still hasn’t even passed the best friend test (where my best friend meets any guy that I could possibly be serious about and gives me a thumbs up or down before I allow myself to get totally heartbroken. This was enacted after my marriage blew up in my face on the grounds that she knew he was all wrong for me when she met him. I however, have to argue that I was sad and vulnerable when I agreed to such a test and feel that I must invalidate the measure.) – because I won’t let her meet him. Mostly because I know that she’ll veto him because she has some idea in her mind of what the perfect guy for me is. Problem is, we strongly disagree on the qualifications. So until we’re officially a couple, she doesn’t get to meet him. And by then, it won’t matter.

For once, I don’t even care how I would answer the question, “so what do you see in him?” because I don’t know. I just like him. Because I do. He makes me happy. And he makes me want to drive 167 miles (one way) just to spend a few hours watching SportsCenter with him. And that’s all that really matters, right?

Ouch.

May 17, 2010 by euniceann

I hurt. I hurt all over.

Oddly enough, it’s from yoga this morning,  not the ridiculously intensive spin class I took tonight.

I slept for three hours this afternoon. I was amazed, given how much pain I was in. I must have needed the rest.

I don’t sleep much any more. Since I started the gym last week, I finally have. It feels nice.

But I still like to take naps when I can.

Creativity rocks

May 16, 2010 by euniceann

Okay bloggies, listen up. I know that many of you are creative types. I know that many of you are giving types.

Through a strange twist of fate called Twitter (yep, that very beast that I vehemently ignored for so long), I was connected with an amazing woman, Tamara, Chief Imaginator at Imaginibbles.

Tamara has what she calls a “Dream Big Promise” – that every man and woman and child on this planet deserve the opportunity to dream big. Problem is, when your most important thought is finding clean drinking water, that can be hard to do. So Tamara donates one Life Straw® for every purchase made in her shop.

Some of you know that I recently hosted a contest on my photography blog (I was in desperate need of inspiration) and the winner received this fabulous journal starter from Imaginibbles.

I just flipped through it before sending it on and I love it. I must have one. And I think you should too. I think it would be really helpful for the days that you want to write, but have no idea what to write. Check it out!

Gym membership: Week 1

May 15, 2010 by euniceann

Well, in the vain of achieving #50 on the 101 list, I joined a gym. I figured that was the likely first step of accomplishing that goal.

But I didn’t just join a gym. I joined the YMCA (ha! Now that song is gonna be stuck in your head too). In fact, I signed my whole family up. Mwa ha ha…

I’m considering modifying the goal to “Get to the gym five times a week.” I kinda like my Thursday night TV. Although re-runs will be starting soon and it won’t matter. I did go twice on Monday, so that has to count for something.

Monday, my mom and I went to a spinning class. It was our first time attempting such a workout, and I have to admit, I was scared. Of all the things I’d ever heard about spinning, I had always been afraid to try it. Which I think says something about what I have heard because even Bikram Yoga didn’t scare me, and that’s a tough workout. But spinning just sounded daunting. Fortunately, all of us in the class that day were rookies, so she went easy on us. We survived.

Tuesday, we took a yoga class in the evening. It was a little strange for me as I’ve been studying Sivananda Yoga at a local studio here in town, so this “Gentle Yoga” seemed more like the yoga class I took in college. But after cycling, it was darn hard.

Wednesday, we hit the machines, and I managed to run past the 5k point, which was encouraging. A few more weeks of training and I can look into running a 5k this summer/fall to cross #7 off the list.

Thursday is my off day, as I mentioned before.

Friday, we did spinning again. This time, with a different instructor. And it was hard. My mom actually had to stop and throw up at one point. Yikes. I sweat my little buns off, but I pushed myself. Hard. And I felt great.

I’m already looking forward to next week. And the point when I can fit into my cute khaki skirt that I had to squeeze into on my first date with Dan last summer.

The ups and downs are wearing on me

May 14, 2010 by euniceann

Yesterday was a rough day. As some of you may know, my dad suffers from bipolar disorder. His lows are pretty bad. As in, he will disappear for days at a time after saying things like, “I’m done,” which leaves us wondering if that was a suicide comment or if he’s just out cooling off and will be back.

It’s draining.

What makes it worse is that my mom exacerbates the situation by yelling at him as though he can just snap out of it. It’s bad enough that she treats me and my siblings like children; it’s worse that she does it to my dad as well.

The only person that heard from my dad at all yesterday was my brother, who managed to get him to answer his phone in the morning. He still didn’t come home until well over 24 hours after he left.

This is hard on me. I hate being around when the energy at the house is so negative. I feel so helpless in trying to make things better. I try to comfort my mom, and she can’t be comforted. I try to comfort my dad and he gets upset with me. I feel, sometimes, like I can’t win.

I climbed into bed last night, feeling totally lonely and isolated and cried myself to sleep.

Here’s hoping for some good days in the future.

Literate junkie

May 9, 2010 by euniceann

Dave Barry has got to be one of my favorite columnists of all time. I got hooked on him in Ms. Cox’s 11th grade English class. Aside from my 6th grade teacher, Ms. Cox was one of My. Favorite. Teachers. Ever.

Maybe it was because she was determined to teach us proper grammar.

Maybe it was because she taught us words such as “ubiquitous,” “exacerbate,” and “pedantic.”

Maybe it was because she could do a crossword puzzle just by having someone read it to her (seriously, the talent was insane).

Or maybe it was just because she read us Dave Barry’s column every Monday.

I always looked forward to Mondays in Ms. Cox’s class. Getting Dave Barry was some sort of special treat for all of us. Much of his column was probably humor far beyond our stunted maturity level, but we enjoyed it nonetheless. Ms. Cox read the column with a panache that I’m sure made it all the more interesting.

So I was super excited to see this on Twitter this morning, from another favorite author of mine, Jen Lancaster: In Terms of Badassness. Brings back some good memories.

Book-a-holic

May 8, 2010 by euniceann

I picked up a copy of Atlas Shrugged yesterday. I’m sure I already own a copy, given that I have a zillion books, but since they’re all in a box in a basement in Denver, I figured I’d just get a new copy so I can tackle this goal (#45) already.

The book is almost two inches thick. The print is super tiny. There are. One THOUSAND. Sixty Nine. Pages.

I’m trying to remember why it is that I wanted to read this again? Oh yeah, because my best friend said I should. I always do what she tells me. Okay, maybe not always. But a lot.

I have to admit that I’m a little more than terrified to start this book. I picked it up last night, thoroughly exhausted, but determined to start it. Read all of two paragraphs and then fell asleep. Just the sheer weight of the book was a little daunting.

With just a three week break from school (one of which I just burned, being utterly grateful that I pulled off an A in my web design class), I am attempting to read this sucker in three weeks. Seeing as it took me nearly two years to finish East of Eden, which was just as thick, but the print was much larger, I’m not so sure I can. But I’m gonna try.

I also pitched an idea to my best friend the other day, which will simultaneously accomplish both #98 and #101 – we are going to start reading some books off of that list together for our new tradition. We’ll each pick a book, we’ll both read it, and then we’ll get together and talk about it. Sort of a little best friend book club. She loved the idea. Cheating?  No. Efficient? Absolutely.

I love contests.

May 4, 2010 by euniceann

You all know how much Sarah Noel and I love a good contest! Recently, after much brainstorming for a new series, I was struck with an idea – why not incorporate the multitude of talented writers that participate in the Musings blog into a piece somehow? Better yet, why not make it a contest (since we love to see people win stuff!)? So here it is — a haiku writing contest!

What, exactly, is haiku? It’s a Japanese form of poetry that has 17 “moras” or syllables. In English, we separate these syllables into three lines of 5, 7, 5 syllables, respectively. They typically contain a seasonal reference as well. Check out the image above, that’s a haiku I wrote about the contest.

What does Japanese poetry have to do with photography, you ask? During one of my favorite photography classes, we were given a haiku and asked to interpret it using our cameras. I loved the assignment and would love to do it again! Sure, I could Google ‘summer haiku’ and come up with hundreds, I’m sure. But that’s no fun and there would be no prizes!

If any of you have experienced the insane winter weather (clear through spring) like we did here in Flagstaff, you can empathize with how ready for summer I am. I’d like to see 70 degree days for a consecutive week. Is that too much to ask? Let’s drown our winter blues with some summery creativity!

The contest:

To help us get into the spirit of summer, I want to see your best summer themed haiku!

To enter, email your haiku to me here at eunice@eunicebrownlee.com by May 10th at midnight, PDT.

I will post all entries here on the blog on May 12th for the readers to vote for their favorite haiku. Voting will be open from May 12th-15th.

The prizes:

Top ten picks – Your haiku will become a photograph! I will take each haiku and attempt to interpret it photographically. I will send you a fine art print of your haiku to enjoy.

Top five picks – The photographs and haiku will be displayed at Il Posto starting June 21st (the first day of summer)! Il Posto is an Italian restaurant in Metro Denver where I currently have my photography on display.  It’s time for a new series to hang and this project will be it! All writing credits will be given to the respective authors.

Top pick – The poem with the most votes will win this fabulous journal starter e-book from Imaginibbles (you know you want it).

(image retreived here)

This prize was chosen to help benefit the Dream Big Promise that Imaginibbles is sponsoring. For every item purchased, Imaginibbles is donating one Life Straw® to a third world country in need of clean drinking water. They have several great items designed to unleash your creative power. Please check out the other items they have to offer and shop around, won’t you?

My baby wrote me a letter

May 2, 2010 by euniceann

What happens when you take a little ink, smooth it across a (usually) hand-cut block and squeeze it through some rollers with a nice piece of paper? The sheer beauty that is letterpress, of course.

omg card
letterpress OMG card, by greengirlpress on Etsy

I am freaking obsessed with letterpress right now. The velvety look of the paper. The bold blocks of color. The pretty way the design dimples the paper. It’s heavenly, I tell you.

red letterpress card
beautiful red letterpress card, by pistachiopress on Etsy

I used to love to write letters to people. Mostly because I love getting them. I have a bit of a stationery fetish as it is. I mean. I simply cannot. Pass. Up. Adorable stationery. I have boxes full of the stuff. Who wouldn’t want to get a nice handwritten card that looked like this?

coffee cup letterpress card
coffee cup letterpress notecards, by paperlovelypress on Etsy

Sadly, I don’t take the time to sit and write letters to people much anymore. The advent of email has made the act of correspondence quick and easy. I still correspond with my sixth grade teacher. She’s the only one I seem to send handwritten letters to any more. We have tried the email thing, we have tried to connect on Facebook, but there is just something that doesn’t feel right about it. Kind of like getting used to calling her “Susan” and not “Mrs. T,” which she granted me permission to do upon my high school graduation 13 years ago. I still call her Mrs. T. And I still write her letters.

When I was a little girl, my dad traveled a lot. He would be gone most of the week, sometimes for a couple of weeks at a time. Back then, long distance calls were fairly expensive, so we didn’t talk to him on the phone, save for a quick conversation to let us know he was still alive. It was well before the days of email, so all we had was the good ol’ US Postal Service. He would send us postcards from wherever he may have been that week, with a note scrawled on the back about how he was enjoying wherever-it-was that he happened to be, something interesting that happened, and a reminder to obey our mother. I still have every single one of those cards in my box of special correspondence.

I’ve had to purge some of the letters from other people over the years, though. As a highly sentimental person, I found value in every letter that anyone took the time to write to me, even those goofy little notes that my best friend and I passed back and forth in junior high school. I tossed most of those letters not long after I stopped being friends with whoever had written them to me, although I do still have the letter that my high-school sweetheart broke up with me (for good) with. It’s tucked inside the graduation card he gave me.

My ex-husband and I had a tradition that I started the first time we spent the night apart: I wrote him a letter for every day that he was gone — some reminder of me and a way for me to tell him that I loved him – and tucked them into his suitcase for him to find. It turned into making a $20 expenditure on greeting cards (thanks to my obsession with them) for the departing half, which then grew into us exchanging a handful of cards every time we had to be apart. We kept up the tradition even into our divorce, when the cards began to express sorrow and pain, rather than, “I love you and I’ll miss you.” I had hundreds of these cards from the seven years we were together. I kept them in a half a dozen Victoria’s Secret boxes for years. One afternoon, as I was moving out of my townhouse, I found the boxes, shoved into the crawl space to be all but forgotten. I opened the box and started reading some of the letters, was momentarily saddened by the notes inside, and then promptly carried them all to the garbage without finishing. No need to keep that around.

Anyway. Back to the letterpress.

After reading Sarah Noel’s ode to letterpress business cards post last week, I decided that to accomplish #77, I’m going letterpress. I like my current business cards okay, the moo card with a photo on front and my info on the back, but I want a really impressive business card. Something totally unique. Sort of like my dad’s coworker, back when he worked for the sawmill, who had his cards printed on actual wood. If that’s not cool, I don’t know what is.

Now if only I can decide whether I want to go elegant or mod with the design…what do you think?

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